Pride vs. Humility

Someone said this to me the other day, "If you just give up and listen to me, I would be the best person to you".  I hope that you see the issue I have with this statement, if you don't, than I certainly hope you would feel differently by the end of this blog.

This line in of itself is the primary issue I have in this specific relationship.  I don't want to embarrass or barrage anyone with details, but this person who said this to me, was and to an extent is very important to me. And for this person to say this, that "they" can only be the best person to me if I give up my individuality, my voice, my preference, the person that I am, that makes me ME,
so that "they" can be the best person to me, is appalling.   How can someone ask anyone to give up their opinions and voice, and what kind of person does that make them?

I hope that you would never have to hear those words from anyone, not even from a stranger.  What that sentence implies is if you just agree with me w/out any opinions or questions or even a fair legitimate discussions,  then we would have the best relationship.  It is a very one-sided perspective, that doesn't include or consider any other perspective then their own.  It is coming from a person that doesn't respect your boundaries.

I can understand (I do not agree with it but I can understand) being in a situation where someone might feel that they are 100% right and have limited tolerance for any discussion, but what I don't understand is imposing that on other people regardless of whether or not you need their support.  If you have limited tolerance for a discussion than fine, just don't impose your ideas and keep them to yourself.   For healthy process, we need to have an open mind for an open discussion.  A person is unable to do this when Pride and Ego enters the discussion.  When people get too proud to consider others opinions and have too much ego to admit or even visit the possibility that they may be wrong.  

A key ingredient in any successful relationship is Humility.  To be humble, my friends, is a great feat and more precious a gift you could give to your loved ones.   Humility is to be selfless, it is not to demand your own way and gain superiority over your companions.  To be humble is to value peace greater over everything else.  When a person is humble, they are willing to have faith, understanding and kindness in their relationship, they are willing to respect people's boundaries and are willing to compromise to come to a happy agreement.  They are willing to let go of their "my way or the highway" attitude.  They value their relationship over any personal agenda.   A great relationship is built on appreciating similarities and respecting the differences.  

“If I was meant to be controlled, I would have come with a remote control”

This entry is a bit grim but much needed and solely based on my perspective as a woman raised in liberal society w/ modern upbringing.   We, women, live in such patriarchal societies, that knowingly or unknowingly our decisions and life choices start revolving and molding to these societal standards.   I would love to think we are all equal and the opportunities and lifestyles presented to us by our society is equal regardless of age, sex, or gender, however, sadly that is not the case in majority.  Expectations of a successful life by majority of our society for women and men are vastly different. These differences are amplified 10-fold in traditional, conservative families.  

Why is it that these ‘patriarchal societies’ and we all know one of these peoples (don’t deny it) eventually find the need to control women’s lives?  Politically and apolitically.  Why is a wife expected to support her husband’s needs, against her own self-interests but the same expectation is not expected from a husband.  Can we for once, expect majority of husbands to support their wives wishes? or if there is a conflict then atleast try to understand them, with their spouse's wishes and desires in mind.   And why is it that when women stand up for injustice against themselves or their sex as whole, they are rewarded with so many frowns, disapproval and push-back?  Why it is an issue or even a point of discussion when a Man asks for a diaper changing station in Men’s restroom, and it is naturally expected to have them installed in Women’s restrooms?  Why is that many states tax women for tampons but not for bandages?  Do you see where I am going with this? I'm just stuck w/ so many "whys?"

Is it just me, or does it seem like us women are always getting the shorter end of the stick?

How hard did woman fight to gain access to basic needs such as voting, owning a property or getting access to contraceptive, and the battle still continues for other necessities.  As you can see it's hard not to notice the differences that still exist today in 2017.  oh and I haven't even mentioned the day to day expectations that woman strive to achieve, compromise on, adjust and battles when they are married into so called "traditional" conservative families. 

What I do hope is that we keep on fighting for justice, for what is right and fair, address these issues at home, and hopefully one day we can start seeing the change.  Women should not feel obligated to or should not have to ask permission to do what they want to do with their life.  And Men, treat your woman right, fairly and considerately, do not get disappointed or controlling when they have a difference of opinion, understand them, if the demands are fair, support them.    Understand their perspective, collaborate with them and treat them as your equal.  You need their support, then ask for it, do not demand it, and expect to give the same in return.    

THe ULtiMAte QuEsTioN

first off: WOAH its been long since my last post.  Amazing how busy life gets, and how quickly we adapt to all of life's fluctuations and changes.   I guess that's the difference between a smooth transition and a rough one, how quickly you adapt? don't you think?..but I wonder..is adaptation always good?  O.o...the one thing I've learned from my field of Science is nothing is always "always";) there are always exceptions that pop up (get it? "always" exceptions heh).  So I guess the main point is to adapt to fit to your changing environment, so that you may thrive for the future.  Adapt, while planning for the future.  Well, that's my 2 cents.

I could go on forever on adaptions/environments/survival from a philosophical as well as scientific perspective..considering I just took an evolution class that blew my mind in regards to earth's biodiversity and species survival across the globe from marine to terrestrial life. And I would, however, I was faced with the ultimate question yesterday, hence the whole reason for my revisiting my oh so abandoned blog (sorry for the negligence blog *virtual hug*)

So back to the the ultimate question,  I'm sure Im not the only one to ask this, and Im sure its boggled the minds of health conscious consumers before. But I was finally faced with it...

Brita vs Pur-which is better?

I see you...do not laugh or roll your eyes.  It's an important question...Water is a basic need for all living life... Brita was definitely a favorite, but then one fine day, as I strolled along, surveying the various items Costco has to offer; as well as searching for a replacement Brita filter, since we were dangerously close to running out of our stock filters...there I saw it..in an aisle..nicely snug among all kinds of Brita filters was Pur.  It peaked my interest instantly!

My decision is...*drum roll please*... I pick Pur over Brita..

And here's why:

1. It was one of those that fit into your kitchen sink faucet
           -now I know brita has those kinds too but we didnt have it, we had the pitcher, which was becoming very bothersome, because we constantly had to clean it- and we had to soak the filter in warm water before using it, which seemed like forever and a was a pain..

2. Pur's design made it very easy to set up

3. It doesn't get in the way when we need to do the dishes-and we do allot of those..cause everyone in my family is a cook...so you can imagine..oh! especially since the dish washer is out..we're not sure when it'll return to us..

4. The replacement was very easy and accessible...I didnt even need to read the instructions.

5. Overall it was cheaper than Brita- you get 6 filters in a pack, instead of the huge individual Brita filters we had to get for the pitcher.

Lastly but definitely not the least 6.  You may need to fact check this but the water just seemed more purified and tastes better compared to the brita..Pur is certified to remove cryptosporandium and giardia- and as cute as giardia is..I do NOT want it in my water..they are both parasitic protozoans which cause intestinal illness.

I vote Pur. The ultimate question is answered. =)

We be bloggin'..we be bloggin'..bloggin' away..bloggin away..bloggin' away now..

Today I'd like to write about...EXPRESSIONS!  I don't know about you but I've noticed some rather hilarious expressions people have when they are standing in front of their own reflection.

Earlier in the week, I was at my University's local coffee shop..it's a cute little place, just walking distance from Science building AKA my second home practically nowadays..anyways this cute little place..justly named "Just Below" has a reflection window on a far end..so here I was waiting in line for my coffee and on the far end, near that reflection window is, there was a line for people wanting their bagels.  Practically every single person waiting in that line, boys and girls included, would check out their appearance on that window...lol i'll admit it...even I have done that before...however,  today I noticed that people had a quick go-to expression for a split second while checking themselves out on that window.  It must be hilarious for the person on the other side, since that reflection window is actually an Office on the other end. Not many people know that ;)

One my good friend has this surprised look every time she looks into a mirror, lifted eyebrows and all, and the funny part is that its such a subconscious effort!  I call her out on it every time I notice it..and yet she still does it..lol  One of my other friend has this weird smile that doesn't resemble her natural smile at all..also an instinctive, subconscious effort on her part..I havent figured that out...whats the point of having an expression that you would never use? o.O

And coincidently, I tuned into History channel this morning and caught the tail-end of a documentary on primate evolutions and guess what they where talking about?..EXPRESSIONS!  they said that over the years primates became very sensitive to facial expressions and that may have triggered the evolution of the face to transmit those expressions and in-turn the brain may have evolved to decode those signals.  Interesting point...I wonder what those split second expressions in-front of the mirror represent...

Prototypical chimpanzee facial expressions and homologous facial movements in a human (Ekman et al., 2002).

Have a great weekend,

This is Mira, signing out!

=)

Hello earthlings!

It all started on a sunny day fifteen years ago, on October 31^st 1997, when five pre-teen girls starring : the event planner of the group, the bookworm, the athlete, the tree hugger just an overall hippie, and the noob who had just moved from LA (aka Me), left home ready for school skipped their last class and took a bus to their local AMC theatres (now a safeway..go figure) and saw Titanic, starring Leonard DiCaprio.  

And so it began...not the skipping class bit though I will admit that wasn't the only time ditching school but just hanging out together...exploring the world from beyond the comfort of our school.  Since then, every year a few of us routinely celebrate our adventure by getting together for a mini-party at a friends place. Though initially the purpose of this merriment event was to celebrate a wonderful movie in which we all bawled our eyes out (did Jack really have to die?!) however now it has progress to a joyful celebration to reminisce that eventful day that strengthen our friendship (and of course Leonardo DiCaprio).  We get together at a convenient time for everybody for mini-party and catch-up, an annual reunion of a sort.  Its amazing to look back and see how our activities have changed over the years...from sleepovers, board games to dinner parties and now a bookclub!  Yupe we are starting a book club!  im excited..we've always updated each other in one way or another on what we are reading but never officially started one. But here we go..we're giving this a shot. 

The first book suggested by the event planner of the group, is "Fifty shades of Grey" by E.L James.  I initially agreed to it but after reading some reviews and the prelude..eehh im not quite sure I want to read this book.  Its not the genre I usually read...i like the fantasy/sci-fi genre..the harry potter types of books..so this is definitely the complete opposite of my preference in books..but I'll give it a shot I guess, and if I cant read it then I suppose I'll just share why I couldn't do it.  

In other news...the olympics started! Go USA!  you know if there was a gold medal given to a country with most goodlooking athletes...i think USA would be a strong contender ;) dont you think...Ryan Lochte need I say more? 

Fact or Fiction?..case in point: C.S. Lewis

Under the banner of fantasy and science fiction genre, authors are given a window to express what they feel without any constraints regarding the world around us...don't you think?  case in point, Brave New World by Aldous Huxley, for example, which is an alarmingly psychic satire on where we may be headed..a futuristic totalitarian society. 

Another such example is the allegorical Animal Farm by George Orwell’s, which was inspired by his strong cynicism with the Soviet Communism; among many such literary “fiction” is the work of C.S. Lewis...the man obviously needs no introduction but just in case you've time travelled from the 19th century..he is probably one of the most influential writer of the 20th century.  Annnd no..im not going to talk about the Chronicles of Narnia..no offense narnians but instead I want to discuss the Screwtape Letters.  

Which is essentially, a clever satire on anyone driven away from his or her motive with temptations.  When I first picked up  the Screwtape letters, the cleverness of it astonished me...i definitely underestameted C. S. Lewis.  In the book, C.S. Lewis states "The world into which I had to project myself while I spoke through Screwtape was all dust, grit, thirst and itch...It almost smothered me before I was done. It would have smothered my readers if I had prolonged it".   And I have no reason to doubt it; the tenacity of reading this book without any personal attachment was a task I found impossible to undertake.  One cause could be because C.S Lewis had written this work to appeal to the readers’ emotions, hence making it very difficult to read without getting emotionally involved. At first glance it may seem he is aiming to appeal to his readers’ religious endeavors, but I believe it also had a universal appeal to anyone who has a set of reason in their lives, and a more distinct appeal to those that lack reason in their lives.

            In the Screwtape Letters, C.S Lewis covers a range of growing human concerns such as politics, religion and education all in the cover of fantasy. He brilliantly steps inside our minds and describes every mental battle we’ve experience in our spiritual journey and tactically disguised it as the deliberate work of the devil.  C.S. Lewis conveys an innovative outlook to the human conscience while offering the idea that it is driven by an unwavering direction steered by the manipulation of good and evil.   As our world progresses, I see a parallel growth between world advances and human concerns.  As divorces and dropout rates go up, issues C.S. Lewis embarks upon in The Screwtape Letters becomes less of a fantastical work and more as a moral guidance.  I know C.S Lewis has his share of critics but in my opinion the Screwtape Letters is the kind of novel that only ages better as our world advances.

See the world you live in..

My most favorite thing to do in the world?  Travel.  I love to travel.  To see the world and experiencing new cultures.  To see the results of human creativity across the world influenced by their own unique cultural perspective.  Personally, I feel people don't travel enough.  In my opinion, everybody should make traveling a priority in their lives.  I know it can be expensive, but traveling doesn't have to be spontaneous (though mine mostly are ;) )  however, nothing is impossible if you plan.

Why should you take my advice? well before the age of twelve, I had been to dozens of Safaris, travelled to at least four Continents and relocated halfway across the world.  Baaam!..but seriously the joys of travel and the early exposure to diverse cultures have greatly influenced my background and my personality.  My family loves to travel, whether its a last minute plan to go on a drive and explore the city we live in or a drive by the beautiful hills in our neighborhood or a planned family vacation to a foreign land.  Since I was a little girl I've been accustomed to traveling.  These travels introduced to me an early exposure to a wide range of diverse cultures.  People's ways of life other than my own,  human creativity at its best.  Whether its to experience life in the outskirts of Africa, where people have made a beautiful organic living without electricity for centuries amidst the breath-taking views of the african savanna or to experience the bustling city of Paris, France aka "La Ville-Lumière", city of lights, in which you can  experience a beautiful fusion of the old parisian life with the flourishing 21st century.

My latest travel was a lovely mother-daughter vacation to the beautiful Kerala, known to locals as "Gods own country." At first, my mom and I were a bit vary since only the two of us could fit long term traveling into our schedule, so we debated between traveling or staying in and going somewhere local for a weekend retreat with most of the family.  We were doubtful to travel abroad especially since we never really had a vacation with just the two of us.  Usually we either travel as a family or at least with most of our family, this was the first time just two members out of our family of six were traveling to a foreign land.  And let me tell you its the best thing we could have done.  Once we came to our conclusion of going, we got in touch with Crossways Travel & Tours Inc., if you are thinking of travel to a foreign place through an agency, then I recommend them with flying colors.  They planned a vacation packet fit for queens for us.  Honestly, they catered to our every need..from day one they had assigned a private car and driver ready to take us where ever we chose..completely dependent on our flexibility, which is helpful because my mother and I are very spontaneous people.  They planned a traveling itinerary including everything we had asked them we wanted out our trip to south india to even more event and places that went above and beyond our expectations.  They simply blew our minds, We couldn't have asked for a better itinerary or agency.  

But enough talking, lets share PICTURES!! since pictures speak a thousand words right? lol o.O

I have gazillion pictures from our trip so let me just share some highlights from our mind-blowing trip..

We first landed in New Delhi..this was the beautiful hotel we stayed at...they booked with the best SERVICE and food ever! I wish we had taken a picture of the shower..it was like a full body massage lol loved it!  

 Enjoyed some fresh coconut juice by a street vendor..

 Saw the beautiful Qutb minar...breathtaking views and mind blowing history...

This was the main reason we wanted to land in delhi first...to see the beautiful delhi akshardham :)

Then our tour of south india began...here some of the awesome hotels we stayed at..no complaints best service ever...spas, pools, diverse menus, friendly customer services ..you name it..


Say hello to the hotel in cohin...great location, right in the city..near all the best restaurants, shopping malls, and best natural harbors..

Moving on to the beautiful, breath-taking munar..

 This was the view from our hotel room...the place was simply heaven...green hills, low population with all facilities, wonderful weather...just pure heaven

From my previous post...you know I love tea..so ofcourse we went tea tasting! 

Destination numbero tres..Thekkedy!  again a wonderful stay!

we enjoyed a spice plantation tour while riding a..you guessed it an ELEPHANT! my first elephant ride ever! mind blown!  this is the view from the top of the elephant :) his name was shintu!

 Mommy and I on Shintu the elephant!

here are a few out the bazillion gazillion pictures I took...enjoy! 

Got to see my very first world famous south indian cultural show...

Yupe we stayed on an houseboat!..thats our houseboat..so relaxing...

private boat ride..

Divine sunset view...

I wish I could share all my pictures...maybe i'll keep updating this post over time..and in time maybe i'll feel like I've capture the essence of our trip...but in short..we had a great time, met great people, and overall it just added to our love of traveling..next time we are planning to go to south america! Rio de Janeiro, Brazil here we come! =D